Film Reviews by None

Welcome to None's film reviews page. None has written 41 reviews and rated 78 films.

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Glass

Boring and annoying

(Edit) 02/11/2019

A decent cast was wasted because this film was just boring and annoying. There can be a slow build to tension. But if it does not progress the story it is frustrating for the audience.

1 out of 1 members found this review helpful.

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The Mule

Decent enough film

(Edit) 02/11/2019

Since the success of Breaking Bad there have been a plethora of TV shows and films about respectable citizens turning to crime to get out of situation that are not their fault. The Mules is no different. Easily watchable and easily forgettable. It would be nice if the cartel members were given more character instead of the stock henchman/El Boss/ruthless sidekick no1.

1 out of 1 members found this review helpful.

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Vice

Pretty good entertainment

(Edit) 02/11/2019

Wow. Christian Bale was great. He changed shape, walk and mannerism over time. The script was very Big Short, which is no surprise considering the writers area the same. Some good exposition for non Americans.

This film gives a different view of of Bush than "W". A weaker character almost subjugated by Charney. Which is real? We'll never know.

0 out of 0 members found this review helpful.

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A Private War

Very worthy but boring

(Edit) 23/10/2019

The acting is absolutely fine in this movie. It was just the story that dragged a lot. I ejected the disk after about half an hour. Although the subject is very low worthy that's all I can say in the film's favour.

1 out of 4 members found this review helpful.

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Alita: Battle Angel

Quite entertaining

(Edit) 06/10/2019

OK. So the plot is silly, and a lot of the future world does not make sense. However the actors are very watchable. They play their roles straight and no matter how dopey their character is, they do a good job. The visuals are excellence without being garish like Transformers. A decent popcorn movie.

0 out of 0 members found this review helpful.

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Fisherman's Friends

Dreadful stereotypes and predictable plot

(Edit) 20/09/2019

This film was a disappointment from just about any way you look at it. Cod Cornish type accents and mannerisms make the village of Port Isaac fifty years behind the time. The pub doesn't have lager, because it is too modern, but they have all selection of oddly named beers on tap. The out of towers are stereotypes of young rich London yuppies. They just don't understand these ere Cornish folk.

The plot is awful and telegraphed. An unnecessary romance is shoehorned in.

No character development and terrible stilted speech make this a real failure.

0 out of 1 members found this review helpful.

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Revenge

Gave up

(Edit) 12/09/2019

Nothing wrong with predictable plot. But all the stupid camera shots of people staring at each other, eating chocolate, bleeding and panting made this a bore. I wanted to shout "just get on with it!" Started fast forwarding then gave up.

0 out of 0 members found this review helpful.

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Bad Times at the El Royale

Decentralised characters, good ot

(Edit) 01/09/2019

Bad Times has high production values. Set, apart from the somewhat flashbacks, in the remote motel on the California - Nevada border, the sets and acting are so believable. There characters were kept very tight so that no one actors dominate the screen. Chris Hemsworth played against type and was frightening a hell. The feel of realism was enhanced by by accident and unintended consequences.

2 out of 2 members found this review helpful.

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Captain Marvel

Mildly entertaining nonsense

(Edit) 01/09/2019

This is is blockbuster trash. Marvel has shoehorned every background element of the MCU into this film and created a porridge off two dimensional characters and a nonsensical plot. Jude Law is great given the limited. Arterial. Graphics are good. Mildly entertaining. Wait for TV.

1 out of 3 members found this review helpful.

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One Cut of the Dead

Boring and unfulfilled promise

(Edit) 29/08/2019

I love foreign subtitled films. Some of the gentle Japanese movies like Departures are entrancing.

I found One Cut boring and uninteresting. OK so it has a long take. Have a cookie. But the content was not gripping. As for the idea, put forward by some reviews, that if you wait long enough there is a pleasant susprise. Nope. Not there. Just another film that fails to deliver to it audience.

1 out of 3 members found this review helpful.

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Mary Poppins Returns

Gave up after twenty minutes

(Edit) 24/08/2019

It was so boring. The songs were forgettable. This was emphasised when Mary appears to the now grown upgrade Banks. A reprise of the original music is a leitmotif and shines like gold amongst the dross of the new music.

0 out of 0 members found this review helpful.

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Sorry to Bother You

Just not interesting. Overlong

(Edit) 24/08/2019

This was just not interesting. Possibly it would have made a 45min TV show, like Inside Number 9. But it felt like every one scene was too long and as a result made the film a bore.

1 out of 2 members found this review helpful.

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Mortal Engines

Average post apocalypse film

(Edit) 18/08/2019

It is obvious why this did not do well at the time of release. Despite some amazing visuals the book was butchered into a scilly story that made little sense.

0 out of 0 members found this review helpful.

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Finding Your Feet

National treasures in lightweight predictable sctipt

(Edit) 14/07/2019

This might have made a decent TV play. 45 mins or so. But as a film, it is was boring and predictable with an rosy eyed view of poorer British living conditions and even dementia.

The attempt to address Timothy Spall's character as a tragic torn husband whose wife is in a care home with dementia is to be applauded. However, and appreciating it was a side plot, he is torn because his wife does not recognise him and gets agitated when he visits. And so decides not to visit her again. As if that is a clean break. "I've said last goodbye." it just doesn't work like that, emotionally, legally or financially.

The run down housing estate where Imelda Staunton moves to after discovering her husband having an affair with herself best friend, may have appeared rough but had none of the sense of desparation tion that exists every day. There are youth's hanging around near the block, but no one seems to afraid to go out or leavers their car there. Honest, that is just not true.

Why did Staunton not just throwing hubble out? Obviousness answer. Then film was full of kind hearted "poor" people. It was all so not real. But the poor lived in places like Little Venice. Spall's ageing Bedford van said "classic" rather than just managing the handyman who would have drive a transit.

Humour was missing. Almost all as if a Carry One film tried to be a social commentary.

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Grand Tours of Scotland's Lochs: Series 1

Actually quite interesting

(Edit) 18/06/2019

Despite thinking this was a mis-spelling of Merton I found Paul Murton's guide to the lochs pretty good. A few places we recognised and yet were still pleasantly surprised to find out interesting new tales. He even mentions the midgies.

0 out of 0 members found this review helpful.