Film Reviews by MC

The only reason I was remotely curious to watch this is because Leigh Francis' alter ego has served as the official spokesman for my favourite multiplex chain for five years, so I might as well familiarise myself with Showcase's official mascot considering I've seen him on screen about two hundred times already. Basically, National Amusements forced my hand. What more can I say about this, other than it is the worst sort of comedy? Putrid and offensive in so many more ways than Francis had in mind than Britain's favourite flavours of bigotry, one nonsensical sex joke stretched out to 85 unholy minutes. Not a single gag is funny, every one of those gags is as forced and scattershot as the cameos, Francis does so little to convince us to care about his perverted playboy persona that his whole presence is nothing less than pitiful, and Verne Troyer - bless his soul - did he commit the best he could to thankless roles like this. I'd breathe a sigh of relief that we no longer get the likes of this on our screens, but then I remember than The Nan Movie literally just opened last year. Did National Amusements not watch this film before deciding that this man should be the Nicole Kidman to their AMC? The man owning the pre-shows for five years? Well, he's the face of the cinema experience anyway, in a country that only had Nicole Kidman light up Odeon screens for a year. Heaven help us all.