Film Reviews by NP

The locations and cinematography are excellent, with establishing scenes often shot through a slight misty autumnal haze, which is very effective. The acting is mixed – some lines are garbled on occasion, but what lets this down is the lack of incident in a very dull and uneventful story.

There is a lot of dialogue issued from curiously underwritten characters. For example, the estranged Frank (Jimmy 'The Bee' Bennett – also the film’s location manager) is treated with contempt by former partner Ingrid (Rose Hakki) and admits he deserves such treatment, but it’s never explained why. From the evidence onscreen, he seems a fairly decent character. Cult actress Rula Lenska is Omi, and it is to her we return during the course of the film where she is given reams of static exposition to unload.

This is a real shame as much of the production is really good. The pace is leaden, any frights are few and far between. It’s not really a spoiler to say that we do see the witch from the title … for a total of about ten seconds, mainly in the anti-climactic finale.

Director and writer Richard John Taylor has helmed a number of productions, many of them gangster yarns (starring the late Leslie Grantham, to whom the production company – Hello Princess - is dedicated). A strong co-writer or script editor would do wonders for future endeavours. A real mixed bag; my score is 4 out of 10.

If you read articles about ‘Morbius the Living Vampire’, you’ll doubtless be reminded how it was one of the biggest flops of 2022. It only made a few squillion dollars profit instead of *loads* of squillions of dollars profit. In the high-flying world of big-budget mainstream films, of franchise ‘universes’, a mediocre performance is unforgivable.

The film itself I found to be okay. The pacing dragged somewhat in the middle, which made me question why it was given 104 minutes of runtime instead of something leaner. The acting from Jared Leto as the title character Michael Morbius is good, supported by a surprisingly flat turn from Matt Smith as his pal Milo – although it's curiously wonderful to hear the former Doctor Who say ‘ar*ehole.’ We also get your typical husky, strutting, growling cop, and there are a few other sundry characters we never really get to know.

Michael conducts a series of blood experiments to cure his malady and that of his friend. It’s no spoiler that he becomes vampirised, but isn’t fazed by daylight or crucifixes and looks smashing with his shirt off.

Overall, the film is average, but with some very good set-pieces. It looks spectacular, of course, in the way that all mainstream films do. Possibly the reason it is perceived as a failure is that it tries to appeal to fans of superheroes as well as horror hounds and ends up satisfying neither. Minus points for the CGI-fest in the final scenes; there are also a couple of tie-ins mid/post credits to the bigger Marvel Universe which will be meaningless unless you’re familiar with other brands and franchises in the factory such films have become. My score is 5 out of 10.

This Finnish horror film starts in a world of pure (and slightly nauseating) ‘loveliness’. The unnamed Mother (Sophia Heikkilä), often equipped with a selfie stick on which to record her regular, wholesome vlogs, is the centrepiece of a blissful and well-off family unit. Except things aren’t quite so blissful.

Slowly, director and co-writer Hanna Bergholm (in her debut film) introduces an element of not-quite-rightness in Mother’s manner. Father (Jani Volanen) also extols a sweet tolerance of events that strays into … the unusual. At the centre of it all, daughter Tinja (a remarkable performance from Siiri Solalinna) tolerates it all, together with occasional ritualistic bullying from her (underwritten) brother and the addition to the family of an outsized bird’s egg.

This is when things become stranger still.

I like films that are difficult to define, and this falls into that category, although ‘psychological body horror’ might just cover it. And yet ‘Hatching’ is also enjoyable simply by sitting back and seeing in which direction events turn and how the characters react to them. By the end, things have moved on to the ‘next’ stage of strangeness, but you get the impression it isn’t quite the end of the story. My score is 8 out of 10.

A host of wonderful, veteran British faces pop up in this thriller/horror directed by Michael Anderson who, with Jenny Agutter, would bring ‘Logan’s Run’ to a cinema near you a few years later. Underused thesps Jack Warden, Ron Moody, and Flora Robson (who beneath her wig, looks uncannily like Peter Cushing!) support the magnificent Jean Simmons as the titular character. Playing her husband David is Cliff Robertson, an actor who gives a good performance despite never appearing to actually *do* anything. Simon Ward plays David’s newly hired chauffeur.

As a horror film, this doesn’t quite work. It’s much more satisfying to be viewed as a steady thriller with creepy elements. Some say the twists and turns in the plot are predictable, but I was happy to go along with it all - even its admittedly overloaded finale. The direction is moody, the cinematography Bava-esque rich, and much use is made of silence at pivotal moments, which is a refreshing alternative to an over-saturating score the like of which are often served up in productions of this nature.

Jean Simmons steals it though – alive or dead! My score is 7 out of 10.

This is a foggy slice of low-budget folk horror in the mould of The Wicker Man. The cinematography is excellent, the choice of locations inspired and the acting helps convey a growing sense of foreboding.

For a slow-moving story, what hurts this production is inconsistent pacing. Much time is taken up with immersing the viewer in the heavy atmosphere, and yet some key moments and plot points are given short shrift. The ongoing business of the ring worn by Rebecca (Beth Park) for example, is given scant explanation, and the figure in the window that bookends the story looks very unsettling, but again isn’t given any reason to be there.

It isn’t always necessary to tie up all the loose ends in a tale such as this – often the continuing mystery fuels the chills, but the lack of reasoning behind certain events prevents the growing horrors from being as effective as they otherwise could be.

Other than that, I really enjoyed this. Rebecca and her partner Jason (Robert Vernon) are good company, and we have every reason to side with them as things get progressively worrying. As the villagers, Richard Hope as Charles and Therese Bradley as Maddy are especially good. Unfortunate CGI effects notwithstanding, I enjoyed this despite the inconsistencies. My score is 7 out of 10.

Strange how, outlandish as they were, the fashions of the early ‘70s leant giallo films a certain sense of style and identity – whereas the overt use of make-up and perms and shoulder pads of the ‘80s look hugely, and comparatively ghoulishly, dated. The male characters are fairly non-descript, heavily chauvinistic but less Neanderthal than their counterparts from a decade earlier; the women all saunter around like they’re Joan Collins; unsurprising perhaps, as the famous actress’s arrival in the TV series ‘Dynasty’ had helped turn it into a continual ratings juggernaut around the time of this film’s conception.

Scratching beneath the brashness of the decade’s veneer, ‘Delirium’ is directed by Lamberto Bava, who seems to promote style over substance. That’s not to say the story is bad, just difficult to engage with. The main character Gloria (Serena Grandi) looks terrific – again heavily manicured, made up and blow-dried – but isn’t really much of character. When the kills occur, they are accompanied by chunky guitar music and the victims assume curious identities (one becomes an insect, another has her head turned into a giant eye). As is often the case, the deaths provide the film's highlights.

It could be said that all gialli is style over substance, so ‘Delirium’ is running to the genre’s form, but it isn’t quite as engaging here as at the height of their popularity, and the musical score is lackluster. My score is 6 out of 10.

Idris Elba gains an American accent for his role as Nate Samuels, doctor, and lion fighter (wisely opting for a ‘soft’ inflection), and is very effective in this nicely directed, fast-moving thriller. He’s ably supported by Sharlto Copley as Martin, and Leah Jeffries and Iyana Halley as his daughters Norah and Meredith.

Visually, the production is near flawless, with the various lions presented as a mixture of real-life and commendably restrained CGI, and the story is a good rush of increasingly dangerous situations.

I read some criticisms that the youngsters behave in an illogical manner. My argument is that bad decisions have long been a lynchpin of this kind of film, even before Dwight Frye’s Renfield ignored the impassioned advice of the locals and decided to travel to the castle in 1931’s ‘Dracula’. If everyone had behaved sensibly and stayed where they were and waited for help, what a short and uneventful film it would be. My score is 8 out of 10.

Prolific UK filmmaker Charlie Steeds writes, directs and edits this medieval horror chiller based on the infamous legend. As usual, this is a slim-budgeted venture, but Steeds enlivens scenes with some terrific cinematography and lighting and some (mainly) convincing acting. The playful, sometimes coarse, humour prevalent in some of the director’s other productions is mainly absent here – instead, gratuity and gore is the main staple.

I really like these kinds of productions, and currently, there are plenty being made in the UK. They remind me of a modern-day Hammer style (the titles here are extremely reminiscent of the legendary studio’s output and locations look similarly winter-bound).

It isn’t flawless. The pace slackens here and there, some of the performances are not as sharp as they might be and occasionally the dialogue is anachronistic – but the story is a good one and well told. Happily, there are also some effectively creepy moments (and a particularly nasty third act). My score is 7 out of 10.

This film, by Charlie Steeds (who is also behind such bloody extravaganzas as Barge People and A Werewolf in England amongst others), features Billy (David Lenik) and Agnes (Rowena Bentley), who are holed up together in Mama Agnes’s log cabin. Despite Bentley's extravagant playing, this production is serious - even tragic - in tone, unlike some of Steeds' other work.

I enjoyed this. The feeling of icy isolation is exemplified by the excellent score. The supporting cast is not quite as convincing as the main two and it’s something of a relief they only occupy a small amount of screen time, as does the main monster figure, featured on the promotional packaging. When we see the creature, he is very effective. My score is 8 out of 10.

This independent production contains much that is good about low-budget, independent films. Every film trick in the book is thrown at the beautifully macabre, grainy locations to make this journey as unsettling as possible. It's clear the narrative isn't hugely important. The acting is often eccentric, accentuating the unreality of the mood - the staple observer, Rachel Audrey (as Cooper) turns in an often self-conscious performance, whose early bizarre grinning 'to camera' is accompanied briefly by a laughter track! Very strange.

Cooper meets up with a frightened, sick local girl played by Mari K. She speaks fearfully of The Beast. It may be the demonic force within her to which she is referring, which gives cause to a disturbing, even erotic, exhumation.

Director Cosmotropia de Xam throws everything at the audience to unnerve them, and the result is a moody, melancholy tour of some truly breathtaking locations: a study of decay.

The DVD of this art-house horror also contains 'The Contaminated Photos of Valentina Crepax' which is exactly that - a selection of images from 'Phantasmagoria' treated with all kinds of effects that blur, fracture, disintegrate, explode, evaporate and unfurl into one another. It is all grotesque and very effective.

Writer and director Steve Lawson produces a rare light-hearted film from his growing stable. Known for slim-budget, mainly studio-bound, dialogue-heavy productions, there is more location work and physical stuff going on here. As with most of his output, I found this very enjoyable.

Morgan Rees-Davies plays Turpin, here revealed as a scoundrel and trouble-maker, and not a very successful highwayman. The books about him, he admits happily, are heavily exaggerated. The hapless Elizabeth (Mollie Hindle) finds this out to her cost, her initial dislike of him inevitably melting as the film goes on.

This is a nicely paced adventure, not quite the bawdy romp it might have been, although lines like “I’m looking for Dick,” and “Yes, I’ll bet you are,” ensure we’re never encouraged to take things too seriously. My score is 7 out of 10.

Director William Eubank succeeds in making a Paranormal Activity film that isn’t like a Paranormal Activity film at all. I think this is the only time that the long-running central character Katie, whose story has been well and truly told, is not given so much as a mention. By this time (2021) there had been seven films in total since the unexpected success of the 2007 original, and the formula – found footage, often taken from static security cameras and protracted scenes – had been over-utilized to the point of stagnation. So this offering goes outside, to an open and detail-filled location, that of a farm run by a large Amish family. Leading the expedition to meet her estranged relatives is the appealing Margot (Emily Bader) and her small gang of filmmakers, determined to find out the reason why Margot was abandoned as a baby by her mother. Great use is made of the nicely shot locations, and the characters are believable and well-played.

The drawback is, without the signature ‘look’ of this entry into the series, Next of Kin becomes just another found footage film, albeit a very well-made, picturesque one. The variety of styles mixes things up, but there are some very obvious jump scares early on, which don’t bode well.

Luckily they are kept to a minimum; this is more about the atmosphere, about an encroaching feel of dread, and features typically illogical decisions from the characters. It has a folk horror, even a Blair Witch vibe, which further separates it from the usual Paranormal Activity films.

The final act is where the scares come out of the dark, and it’s all very effective. I get the impression the sound levels throughout have been set deliberately low so that the increasing number of bangs and crashes are unnervingly LOUD by comparison. Very enjoyable. My score is 8 out of 10.

Argentinian irector Martin Desalvo has created an understated horror film that is the epitome of 'a hidden gem'. The accent is very much on isolation, loneliness, seduction and sickness. Lots of sickness. The pacing is leaden, and there is very little in the way of spectacle - and no CGI (some consider this important). The atmosphere is the thing, and the viewer is given every reason to immerse themselves in it. Jorge Chikiar's haunting score embellishes this further.

Mora Recalde plays Virginia, a lonely woman living with her father in the midst of the bleakest of locations. Romina Paula is Anabel, a cousin who comes to visit - and it's very clear all is not well with her.

There is much emphasis on eyes, on furtive glances, of something vaguely sexual. This will be too uneventful for some, but it ticks all the boxes for me.

With subtitles.

The dangers of taking someone for granted!

We all get into a rut from time to time and it is human nature not to always respect others. This is very much how Herr Raab finds himself - or at least, how his nearest and dearest find him. Part of the perverse joy of watching RW Fassbinder films is that we're only privy to what he wants us to be privy to. We observe people, and hear their (often meaningless) small talk, but don't necessarily know what they're thinking. Raab seems to endure his lot with stoicism.

There are parallels within Fassbinder's to that of the UK's celebrated director Mike Leigh: the minutiae of the everyday takes on a new and often murky meaning under their lens. And yet their observational film-making is never boring. Such is the case here. Throughout the cringingly monotony, there is the feeling that not all is well.

Pressures to succeed, to conform, to literally keep up with the Joneses, delivered so casually on a day-to-day basis with no possible way out shows very well the smallness of existence. An unforgiving life study, this is well worth a watch.

This has been compared to ‘It Follows’; while I didn’t enjoy that, I had a great time with this. The nature of the evil being passed from person to person is much more solid here and smacks less of the superficial titillation the earlier film is guilty of. If it reminds me of anything, it would be ‘The Ring’.

Plenty of frightening moments and jump scares enliven a fairly slow-burning story that could easily have fallen into a pattern of repetition. Director Parker Finn accomplishes this with imagination, and a true sense of unease, helped enormously by Cristobal Tapia De Veer’s kaleidoscopically manic soundtrack.

As the threat becomes more tangible, the ghost of CGI threatens to cartoon-ify some climactic scenes, but they are subtly used and so much more effective for it. While the story uses many set pieces that have been done before, the acting is strong enough to keep it entertaining. I was pleasantly surprised by ‘Smile’, and am glad it appears to have become 2022’s Halloween ‘hit.’ My score is 8 out of 10.