Film Reviews by porky

Absolutely NOTHING Comes at night or even in the Day,Just Boredom . Yawwwwnfest .

Possibly one of the Slowest and Most Tedious films I have seen over the last 2 years ...

It is just another Typical, Post Apocalypse ,worried about getting sick ,everyone paranoid about everyone else having the infection kind of thing ,of which there are Millions at the moment . I wouldn't bother ,it almost Bored me to death waiting for anything relevant to happen between the teenage boys Nightmares .

Confused Movie, It started out very promisingly,offering an interesting ride along with a pair of Serial Killers but ended up just anther silly Slasher/ Cannibal movie with no real point . Too many open ended stories undeveloped and for No Point at all ,offering a smattering of Unexplained but seemingly Tagged On for effect Alcoholism, Confused Homosexuality ,Creepy Lodger and even (unseen) Incest along the way . Pointless ,troubled back stories to characters we never know more about ...WHY ?

All Pretty Average Slasher fare though. you get Woods, a Big House ,Young Couples, Unseen Killer in a Mask,

Unusual Anthology of stories. Bizarrely I cant remember a single segment of which there were 9, I believe .

It was enjoyable .but it seems as I can not remember any of it ,so Very Forgettable too.

No real reason for the Film Title . apart from some Clock faces ticking away between the segments ,One of which was Animated .

Vaguely based on the True story of the Winchester Family and the Continual Building of an eccentric House .

Not a Bad Ghost Story Movie, some scary -ish moments .My only real peeve was i felt Everyone had been Badly Miscast in this Movie.

Helen Mirren is the lynch pin and the Best in the movie but even she feels Wrong for the part with a very fake American Accent. maybe Cathy Bates would have been a wiser choice ?

Anyway, apart from the uncomfortable Casting it isnt a Bad Scary Movie. Fairly good quality effects ,almost like an INSIDIOUS movie but based in Victorian times. well worth a few watches .

Very Good 2 part Story ,Great Acting, Effects, Interesting Format.

Part 2 is a little slower than Part 1 ,but takes off where Part 1 ends so is More a Continuation that a New story .

Pretty Average entry in the Jigsaw story. Thankfully a lot less Frantic than the last 2 which got on my nerves a bit,The main character of the previous few being deeply uninteresting or believable, but this one is enjoyable. if not all a bit obvious, as the same story twist has been used soo many times through the Jigsaw series. so often it isnt really a Twist anymore ,its just what you come to expect.

Pretty Average Horror .The Same thing as usual. Warning !!! That item is Possesses so Dont Ever Open It..... Oops its Opened. people Die.

Only in this case the people have put themselves into what they thought was a Game for Halloween but a Demon just Possessed the Actor paid to scare you , and you are all gonna DIE.

NONE of the Deaths even need have happened apart from the fact these people are Soo Stupid and go Stand or Sit within Murdering reach of a Murderer chained to the wall. and they dont seem to see the fact they could maybe Kill him First as he is Chained up and unable to get away....but instead just Fight among themselves and ignore the Murderer in the room chained to the Effing Wall !!!!

Just Stupid and Irritating,

To be honest they ALL deserved to Die for being Thick as Dog Doo doo ! it left me wanting to hunt them down myself and kill them .

Pretty Weak background story leading to Title of Movie, But not a bad film once you get past that .

Its not Great and for some reason ,someone ,somewhere has decided Unfunny Comedian Ross Noble is now a Horror Actor, shame he cant actually Act....

Drags a bit and as is usual in a Horror movie,all the characters are stupid .No one believes one another, and Everyone thinks the Victim is Going Mad ,seeing things and Ghosts dont exist.

Entertaining enough but I wouldnt bother seeing it more than the once . its not that good.

Very Quirky, Original, Well made ,Great Effects ,Gorey and Funny.

I would say it was the Best Movie ive seen from Japan in a very long time. and certainly one of the Best Movies from Anywhere ive seen this year .

Definitely worth more than the one viewing . possibly even worth purchasing, its an unusual one and well worth looking out for Part 2 .

Its OK.... No Reason at all to Remake it, Its certainly Not Better than the original .

Totally Ruined ,as is EVERYTHING, with Johnny Depp being in it.Sadly I hadnt realised he was, otherwise I wouldnt have bothered at all.

Films Cast isn't nearly as Wonderful as the 1970's Movie with Real Old Time Hollywood Stars in.

All in all , a Pretty Average production ,OK for an afternoon. but I wont waste my time seeing it again.

Got sent this by accident ,but watched it anyway, Sorry I bothered to be honest,

It was Very Slow, Dull and didnt really explain What was happening ,and Why it was happening.

A really Irritating bunch of Characters . Half English /Half Subtitled . No body you cared about .

I couldnt wait for it to end ...infact after a good while i gave up and just turned it off . straight into the envelope and sent it back.

An OK Movie but left Open Ended as it is based on a Real Case that has No End .

A Story built up out of Guess work ,Points the finger but no real evidence and no real Outcome.

OK, Now this Could have been a Really Good Movie, the Quality of special effects was high. the Idea was pretty appealing ,but the Script just makes EVERYONE into Brainless Morons that DO exactly what you know and everyone knows you dont do ....

They stupidly Ignore any Danger and then Die. even when people have died horribly in front of them and they know exactly what to do to save ther lives they STILL do the stupid thing that gets them killed ...

And THAT alone is SO Annoying I cant bare to watch what could have been a Great Movie ever again.

The sheer Irritant the Characters in this give you might actually give you Ulcers . or at least a strong drive to Kill kill kill .....

I have loved all of the Pitch Perfect movies, this is no different. maybe could have done with a bit more on stage act and less kidnapping but otherwise it was fun and Fat Amy came to the rescue ! Well worth a laugh of an evening .

Very Strange and Funny Cult Horror Comedy from Japan. Bonkers is the best description I can give it. Girl Eating Piano, Evil Magical Cat, Flying Severed Head, Death by Banana , Talking Water Melons , what more can I add to make you Watch it ?